AminaZena Blogs: August 2012

A lot of people are afraid to tap into their potential and be the best version of themselves, and if everybody did the world would be full of great people doing big things. We’d all be happy, healthy, financially stable and no one would be suffering, but that’s clearly not the case. And if I would of read something like this 3 or 4 years ago I would probably get squeamish - actually I wouldn’t have read something like this 3 or 4 years ago because I was too busy partying and pretending to do homework. Nothing wrong with that, but my point is that sooner or later it’s time to grow up.

Don’t get it twisted though, growing up doesn’t mean you have to put on a suit everyday and stop laughing at silly jokes and act like life is just one big serious ordeal. Growing up means realizing that you were given certain gifts and strengths to utilize to make the world a better place. See, everyone is good at something, everyone has something they like to do, and everyone has a dream. Most people aren’t living their dreams though, and it’s actually quite upsetting and perplexing to me.

I’ve gathered that most people are just kinda scraping by at some job that they really don’t like at all. Wearing what everyone else is wearing, doing what everyone else is doing, always worrying what other people are thinking about them and trying to so hard to ignore that nagging voice inside their head that keeps trying to tell them to stop caring so much and just live. It's a pretty common theme; the result of fear and lame excuses. I’ve spent countless hours reading blog posts about people who couldn’t take it anymore and decided to actually live their dreams instead of wasting away behind a cubicle (no offense if you actually like your cubicle), and I decided that I wanted to contribute, although I’m not exactly where I’d like to be yet.

You see, I’ve haven't quite felt the feelings that I’ve just described to you because I don't try to surpress my inner desires, but I can empathize because I know what it’s like to feel fear. I sometimes fear that I won’t end up living the life that I’ve envisioned for myself, or that I’ll never meet the right guy, or that I’m making a fool of myself on the internet (well, I kind of enjoying making a fool of myself on the internet but that’s besides the point). I’m more afraid of not reaching my goals than caring about what others will think if I go after them. I’ve been “different” my whole life, and I spent a lot of it wanting so bad to fit in, but one day in middle school I realized that being a bi-racial girl with an afro, a big butt and a twin brother in the suburbs of a college town in the middle of West Virginia wasn’t gonna cut it as “normal."

So I decided to embrace it and I’m definitely glad I did because it’s taken me far. Even when I’m tired, or feeling uncertain I take steps forward, because despite the occasional bouts of insecurity I know that one day I’m going to get to where I want to be (which includes a fine-ass, rich and loving manfriend/husband). It’s all about adopting that do or die attitude, and as extreme as it sounds, it’s what needs to be done if you want results. I’m not trying to get all new age on you, but if you really want something for all the right reasons, and are working towards it the Universe will conspire and meet you halfway to make sure your goals are met. I moved to NYC with absolutely no money, no friends and no job, and I’m here I am one year later with great friends, multiple streams of income and a beautiful one bedroom apartment - that’s not luck, that’s Devine intervention whether you want to believe it or not.

Now I’m not this outrageously successful public figure turned rap star/ athlete who overcame a life of extreme poverty and disease, and there are many entertainers that I admire myself but sometimes what you need more than dose of fantasy is a dose of reality. I’m just like you, I’m your peer, I went to college and found that my degree doesn’t mean much, I’ve worked sucky office and restaurant jobs, and I’m not going to tell you that following your dreams is easy but I know for fact that it is worth it. I also know for a fact that if you want something you got to go get it, and give it your all while you do because you only get one shot at life and your life could end tomorrow. Hell it could end as you’re reading this sentence.

So many people post Facebook statuses and Twitter updates about only living once and following your dreams but how many people are really doing just that? It’s easy to get inspired for a few minutes after listening to your favorite artist, or watching your favorite movie, but it’s time that you stay inspired, and that you get focused, and take positive action instead of day dreaming your life away.

Whether you want to be the world’s best chef, or school teacher, or hair dresser, or start a day care, or be a pop star, now is the time. Now is all you got. Set a clear plan of action for yourself, set goals and get shit done. Strive for excellence in everything you do and excellent is what you’ll be. Everyone has a different idea of what their perfect life is, and I’m certainly not going to tell you what that is, that’s up for you to decide. I just want to encourage and motivate you, and to let you know that you’re not a lone out there.

And although it’s imperative that you set goals, and keep setting goals once you’ve met the previous ones, the most important thing of all is that you learn to love the process. Life is a journey, not a destination. There is so much beauty in everyday life, but you’ll miss it if you spend your time doing something you hate and not being present to take it all in. So to answer your question there is more to life, it just a matter of whether or not you’ll go out and see for yourself.

Okay, my brain hurts, and I can only be sentimental and meaningful for so long before I want to start talking about makeup and boys. So I’m out. I hope you gained something from this post. Don’t act like you didn’t. We gotta work on making the inside look just as good as the outside!

Sexy is a LIFESTYLE.

That's all I got for now. Later Bitches.

XoXo,

AminaZena

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When it comes to your looks, a little attention to detail goes a long way. These are just a few tips on how to go from good to great.

10.Keep Your Eyebrows Plucked- eyebrows absolutely make or break your face, you should really keep them shaped at all times. Nobody should look like they have 2 caterpillars on their forehead. Either buy a pair of tweezers or get them waxed or threaded by someone else. Not too thin tho, keep it classy.

9. Nix the Panty lines. This isn’t 1979, and panty lines are absolutely atrocious, if it’s that time of the month it’s a little more understandable but you can always wear a loose skirt or dress to cover those granny panty lines up. Otherwise it’s seamless boy shorts and thongs FTW.

8.Having Good Posture- For goodness sakes stand up straight! Sit up and walk tall and proud muthafucka! Slouchy is anti sexy in both men and women and is often the result of weak back muscles, try doing more back exercises in your work outs, and if you aren’t working out you betta start!

7.Whiten Your Teeth- If you look in the mirror and see even a twinge of yellow you’re well overdue for a teeth whitening session. There’s no excuse to have yellow teeth. You can whiten your teeth with a 2 dollar box of baking soda or use an all natural product for $10 by Britenz. You can’t even slightly justify having yellow teeth, you really can’t.

6. Keep Your Nails Did - Now I personally think that a woman should always have some form of polish on her nails, even if it’s a clear top coat. Maintaining your nails doesn’t take much time and boy oh boy does it make a difference. People see your hands all day, and even more importantly YOU see your hands all day, they should be worth looking at. TOES included.

5. Flattering Hair Cut- it goes without saying that you should always leave your house with your hair done, but if you have an unflattering hair cut it won’t matter if it’s done or not. The hair cut you want and the hair cut you need might be 2 different things, you should research which kinds of cuts go with your face shape, it really makes a world of difference.

4. A Touch of Make Up- I think all females should wear a little make up when stepping out of the house, especially if you’re single because you never know who you might meet and you definitely don’t want to look like shit if you meet someone great. A little tinted moisturizer, mascara, and lip gloss can go a long way. If you’re not really into wearing makeup I suggest you that head over to Sephora and play around and see if you feel the same way after you leave. You won’t.

3. Blingage- an outfit is only as good as the accessories you wear with it. You can turn a basic t-shirt and jeans combo from fugly and boring to super cute and fun with the right ring or necklace. And the best part about jewelry is that you can find ultra cheap stuff that actually looks good. Don’t get too avant-garde with it though, jewelry is meant to accentuate you not embarrass you.

2.Clothes that fit - If you’re swimming in your in your blouse or have a muffin top pouring out of your slacks your shit doesn’t fit right and you know it. It’s not hard to tell when clothes don’t fit because you can feel that they don’t fit. Clothes should lay nicely on your body, they should be fitted, comfortable and functional - but when in doubt choose looking good over comfort- this is the age of Facebook and nobody wants to look like shit on the internet.

1. Having a nice body- this isn’t a little thing, but I’m a personal trainer and exercise instructor so what do you expect. Truth be told, no matter how much make up you wear or how good your hair looks, the appearance of your body trumps everything. Looking like you’re out of shape has never been in. So if you aren’t on your working out/ eating right game now is the time to start.